” I LOVE YOU” the best and well; to many the toughest phrase to express. Yet certain people will express it too often and some never at all.
” Durraiya you can’t express yourself well, it’s the toughest thing for you.” This is the reason why am writing this as few days back my friend came up with this. Now I do agree that I usually dont express my feelings but it is not true for the people close to me. For strangers, yes I certainly keep my emotions in check all the time. No, no particular reason for that, just feel they shouldnt be allowed to something so personal… so soon.
Expression is the way of communication of your feelings, etc. Some do it clearly, some hesitantly and some with difficulty. But to each his own. Whats worse is that when you do manage to express ( thats for people like me) the other should get it. I mean there are several ways of expressing from boring lectures to an impactful word, from a simple gesture to a gentle touch, from a secretive smile to a mischievous wink , from elegant flowers to expensive gifts! (maybe my friend would have never said I was inexpressible had I gifted her an expensive stuff!)
A lot of relations go haywire because of lack of communication. Yeah thats what most of the shrinks say, and it is true! But what I understand is not lack of communication/ expression. It’s the way how you communicate. No am not talking about the mediums of letters or SMSes. Guess; I can’t express it well, so lets use an example.
A girl had a crucial exam the next day but was appearing for the same exam for the last two years & attempting again as she lacked courage to protest against the parental pressure. Thus studies was the last thing on her mind ( An issue she had blown out of proportion!) .
So she texted her guy expressing how she felt and what she felt . The guy always supported her and soothed her which in turn really brightened her mood (as is the case for every other girl). The phone beeped. It was a message from him. As expected, he soothed her in the first two lines but came so strongly later on (kind of ordering , which doesnt go well down with me too) to “JUST STUDY”. This really irked her and sent him a cold “BYE” and switched off her phone. She was so furious she didn’t want to think even a single second of what just happened and just started studying.
She not only cleared (finally!) but fared the exams really well. And couldnt stop thanking him because he was one of the major reason for her good grades. Thinking of that incident she felt so foolish; maybe she ought to. For he surely meant something good for her but she perceived it wrongly. Now, was it due to the way he expressed it – the strong ordering way; hoping reverse psychology would work for her . Or maybe she was expecting soothing calming words every single time ?
Dont know the exact reason, but..
Different things work for different people. The key is finding the right form to express your true feelings . It may seem a little difficult but its the best way to…